The Power of Love In Creating What Matters

**************************************************
"SIMPLY SUCCESS" --January 30, 200
=======================================
>Helping You Create What Matters MOST in Life and Work
Bruce Elkin: Life/Work Renewal Coach
Personal - Professional - Organizational
http://www.BruceElkin.com
Sent to subscribers only. Names are never shared or sold!
To leave list or change email address, scroll to bottom.
**************************************************

Hi {!firstname},
Wacky weather here in Victoria. Rain, sun, wind, hail, snow, and
bright blue skies, all in the same day.

Still it remains pleasantly mild and the flowers are beginning to
bloom. Spring is on its way! And spring is a great time to talk
about love in the creative process.

In the creative process, love (or passion) is a source of power.
Focusing on what you love and want to create helps you embrace and
transcend the messy complexity of daily life and work. It helps
you work you way above the mess to what I call the simplicity on
the other side of complexity.

This is not as complex as it sounds. Here are some examples of
transcending messiness by focusing on what you love.

Chronically overweight people who have trouble exercising and
eating right suddenly find they do both easily when they fall in
love with something such as road running or mountain hiking or
cross-country skiing.

When business folks struggle to make a buck doing things they don't
care about shift their focus, skills and energy to something that
they truly love and want to create, they often find themselves in
both emotional and financial flow.

A client of mine, for example, recently gave up on a coffee shop
venture he was doing more for his partner than himself, and is now
happily working on the thriving dance business that supports his
love of all things dance.

Couples, too, can tap into the power of love to co-create wonderful
relationships. With coaching help, for example, Celia and Al
transcended what they called "an ugly mess" and shifted their
relationship into a simple, elegant order. “

We were in the middle of a bitter argument,” Celia told me. “Al
accused me of things, and I accused him of worse. At one point, it
got so complex we forgot what we were arguing about. We dredged up
ridiculous stuff from the past and through it at each other. It was
a real mess. I didn’t think we’d ever get out of it.

“Then, during one of the on-going versions of this fight, Al
suddenly stopped arguing, and looked at me with compassion in his
eyes.“ I’m sorry Cee,” he said. “I love you. I don’t want to
fight anymore.”

“In an instant, all my defenses fell away. I felt the power of his
love. I knew in my heart that love was much more important than
winning the argument.

"My own love came surging back to the surface. I threw my arms
around Al and kissed him. I knew we’d made it through the mess and
were headed for the simplicity on the other side.”

Celia admitted that this moment didn’t magically solve all their
problems. However, it did help them reconnect with what mattered
most--on the other things they loved, and wanted to create, alone
and together.

Focusing on what they loved caused many of their problems to
dissolve, to simply fade away in the face of the powerful higher
force of love.

“What we thought were HUGE problems between us just melted away,”
Celia said. “What was left were the core issues. Buoyed by our
loving feelings, we focused on those issues from a creative stance.

"By agreeing about what we really wanted, we accepted the
differences in how we each created our part. We experimented with
new ways that let us both get what we wanted. And it worked.
We're creating the life we want, and our relationship is working
wonderfully.”

Love truly is a powerful simplifying and success-creating force.
It pulls divergent thoughts and behaviors into a, simple,
easy-to-use way of rising above difficult and messy situations.
Moreover, love is the primary driving force behind all successful
creating.

“The creation of something new,” said Carl Jung, “is not
accomplished by the intellect but by the play instinct acting from
inner necessity. The creative mind plays with the objects it
loves.”

Creators so love the idea of their envisioned creations that they
do whatever is takes to bring them into being.

Acting in harmony with the force of love, individuals and couples
can co-create what matters. Indeed, as Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
said about love in his book, Wind, Sand, and Stars, “love does not
consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in
the same direction.”

As Celia’s and Al’s love became more complex, fuller, and deeper,
their relationship became simpler, richer, and more fulfilling.
They created, as Celia said, their own form of the simplicity on
the other side of complexity.

Focus on what you love, accept reality as it is, and take action to
bring what you love into being. Yes, it will take work and
practice, but it's worth it, doncha think?
-------------------------------------------------------------



> ARE YOU DOING WHAT YOU LOVE WITH YOUR LIFE?
Would you like to create what truly matters to you in life/work?
=========================================
I work with capable people who are stuck, stalled, or struggling
with complicated life/work challenges.

I help them develop the SKILLS, STRUCTURE, and SUPPORT to make the
complex simple, and get going on what matters. I also encourage
and support practice as they turn visions into reality!

I can help you find what you love-and create a life that shows it!

> NOW is is a great time to re-assess purpose, direction, and
action. It is a great time to enter into a coaching relationship.
It can help you make this year, your best year ever!

My practice is full at the moment, but I'm taking a waiting list,
and spaces will come open in February and March.

>If you would like my fr.ee 7-page info package, e-mail me with
"Coaching Info" as the subject at Bruce@BruceElkin.com
---------------



FEEDBACK FROM A READER DOING WHAT SHE LOVES
==================================
I wanted to share this note with you because I thought Linda's
story about saying "yes" to what truly matters was most impressive,
and instructive. Enjoy!

Hi, Bruce --

I just wanted to let you know once again how much I am inspired and
encouraged by your newsletters! I hope you have an absolutely
WONDERFUL 2008, with much success and joy coming your way.

At the ripe old age of 57, with a husband who just retired, I've
just taken what I consider MY "dream job" as the program
coordinator for the 130+ Extension Master Gardeners here in
Guilford County, North Carolina.

It's only a part-time position, not what most would consider a
"career move," but it suits me to a "t" . . . and it never would
have come about if I hadn't decided to "go for it" and pursue a
long-held dream of becoming a Master Gardener last year.

I live 20 miles from the Ag Center, the Master Gardeners have to
commit to 50+ hours of education and volunteer service each year,
AND we have to pay for the privilege, so it's not what I'd call a
convenient thing to do.

However, as I've seen time after time after time in my life, the
things that either scared me the most or were least "practical"
ultimately proved to be the most richly rewarding, soul-nourishing,
and satisfying undertakings of all.

I've learned that saying "yes" is perhaps the most life-changing
and life-affirming choice anyone can ever make.

May you encourage thousands more to dream . . . and to go after
those dreams! All good wishes to you.

Linda
--------------------------------------



QUOTABLE QUOTES:
=============
"Go to the truth beyond the mind. Love is the bridge."
-- Stephen Levine

"You have to find something that you love enough to be able to take
risks, jump over the hurdles and break though the brick walls that
are always going to be placed in front of you. If you don't have
that kind of feeling for what it is you are doing, you'll stop at
the first giant hurdle."
-- George Lucas

"It is not how much you do, but how much Love you put into the
doing that matters."
-- Mother Teresa

"We should not feel that close relationships are infeasible, but
they are demanding. Through experience, we come to realize that in
love nothing comes as easily as we expected. Everything beautiful
has to be worked for."
-- Eknath Easwaran

"Love is the force that ignites the spirit and binds teams together."
-- Phil Jackson

"You've got to get up every morning with a smile on your
face, and show the world all the love in your heart."
-- Carole King
--------------------



If you want help learning to practice, master, and create what MOST
matters to you, let me know. I'm happy to send you my coaching
info package. Just email me with "Coaching Info: as subject at
Bruce@BruceElkin.com
Cheers!
Bruce
**************************************************
> BRUCE ELKIN:
Personal, Professional, and Organization Renewal Coach
>Call: 250.388.7210 www.BruceElkin.com Or Skype Me!
**************************************************
> View the current issue of my full newsletter at
http://createwhatmattersmost.blogspot.com/
-------------------

> USEFUL RESOURCES AND PLANNING TOOLS:
=============================
Thinking about creating or upgrading your website and marketing
approach? I use these tools with great results and recommend them
without reservation. And Robert has recently made some great
updates to the Website Toolkit. Great stuff!

* For info or to purchase a copy of THE WEBSITE TOOLKIT,
please go to http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?af=73714

* THE ACTION PLAN TOOL KIT can make designing and
Implementing a marketing plan easier, effective, and fun.
Go to http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?af=73714
----------------------------

READER'S FEEDBACK AND SUCCESS STORY

Hi, Bruce --

I just wanted to let you know once again how much I am inspired and encouraged by your newsletters! I hope you have an absolutely WONDERFUL 2008, with much success and joy coming your way.

At the ripe old age of 57, with a husband who just retired, I've just taken what I consider MY "dream job" as the program coordinator for the 130+Extension Master Gardeners here in Guilford County, North Carolina. It's only a part-time position, not what most would consider a "career move," but it suits me to a "t" (literally everyone I know who has read the job description has finished and said, simply, "This is you."), and it never would have come about if I hadn't decided to "go for it" and pursue a long-held dream of becoming a Master Gardener last year. I live 20 miles from the Ag Center, the Master Gardeners have to commit to 50+ hours of education and volunteer service each year, AND we have to pay for the privilege, so it's not what I'd call a convenient thing to do. However, as I've seen time after time after time in my life, the things that either
scared me the most or were least "practical" ultimately proved to be the most richly rewarding, soul-nourishing, and satisfying undertakings of all. I've learned that saying "yes" is perhaps the most life-changing and life-affirming choice anyone can ever make.

May you encourage thousands more to dream . . . and to go after those dreams!

All good wishes to you,
Linda

The 3 P's of Peak Performance

**************************************************
"SIMPLY SUCCESS" --January 9, 200
=======================================
>Helping You Create What Matters MOST in Life and Work
Bruce Elkin: Life/Work Renewal Coach
Personal - Professional - Organizational
http://www.BruceElkin.com
Sent to subscribers only. Names are never shared or sold!
To leave list or change email address, scroll to bottom.
**************************************************

Hi ,
Happy Belated New Year!

I hope you had a pleaant festive season, and are looking forward to making 2008 a, simple, yet successful and flourishing year.

One of the keys to doing so is practice. Too many of us get good ideas and think we can think our way into success. But we can't. I call that approach the academic fallacy -- the notion that insight leads to action and success.

If that were so, there would be no market for the 10's of thousands of self-help books, tapes, DVD's … on the market. People would get the ideas, and then go do them. NOT!

Only 4/5 of people who bought gym memberships to get fit and healthy this year will use them. Most people will have given up on all their resolutions before June!

Why?

Usually because they are not getting the results they imagined. And the reason they don't get the results is usually because they don't practice enough.

They get bored or frustrated on the flat part of the learning curve and give up before they hit the upturn where the curve gets steep, and results come quicker and easier. The steep part is the good part of the learning curve!

Practice may not make perfect, but it does help you make progress. It helps you grind your way across the 80% of the learning curve that is flat so you can reap the 80% of results that come from the last 20% of practice.

To help you think more seriously about the power of practice, I've reworked an earlier article that should help you embrace practice, peristence, and passion--and turn your resolutions into reality.
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10,000 HOURS!
Tapping the 3 P's of Performance for Consistent Success

Did you know that participants in the Turin Olympic ceremonies practiced their routines 11,000 times? And the figure skaters practiced each element in their programs 14,000 times?

Similarly, Buddhist monks who tested off the scale for inner peace and compassion sat in meditation for over 10,000 hours?

10,000 hours! Why?

Because there is awesome power in practice and persistence.


PASSION + PRACTICE + PERSISTENCE = MASTERY
A key source power is passion. But, to tap it, you have to practice.

But passion alone is not enough. Vision without practice becomes daydreaming. Without persistent, regular practice, passion fades.

The best way to integrate passion, practice, and persistence is to develop mastery in the skills and structure of creating what matters most to you.

In Aikido, the master is the one who stays on the mat five minutes longer than anybody else. The one who puts in his or her 10,000 hours.

Although rich in talent, Wayne Gretzky, of hockey fame, was first on and last off the ice from the time he started playing until he retired. He translated his natural talent into real and lasting success through passion, practice, and persistence.

You can do the same.


WANT TO GET LUCKY?
Not only do practice and persistence tap passion's power and enable you to create successful results. They also make you lucky.

Legendary golfer Ben Hogan was interviewed after winning a major tournament.

"Mr. Hogan," said a reporter, "You were under amazing pressure in this tourney yet you consistently hit remarkable shots. How do you do it?"

"Hmm," said the laconic Hogan, "I suppose I'm just lucky."

"Just luck?" said the reporter. "But you practice more than any player on the tour."

"Well," said Hogan, "I guess the more I practice, the luckier I get."

Hogan loved golf. Gretzky loved hockey. Enduring success in all fields comes to people who love what they do, and persist in their practice until they achieve mastery, grace, and excellence.

What DO you love?


THE MOST PAINFUL, CREATIVE ACT OF LIFE
What brings you most fully alive? What engages and energizes you? What do you MOST want to create?

If answering these questions is difficult, you are in good company.

Sir Geoffrey Vickers said, "Learning what to want is the most radical, the most painful, and the most creative art of life.”

Three things get in the way of knowing what you truly want.

• We focus on what is second, third, or tenth most important, because we're afraid to fail at what is most important.

• When asked about passion, many are quick with "YEAH, BUT…" comebacks.

People say, "I know what I am passionate about, BUT I don't know how …." Or, "I do not have enough time. Or money. Or confidence." Or, often, "Yeah, I want x, BUT somebody or something always gets in my way."

The motivational energy created by the "Yeah!" is instantly negated by the "but…." With no energy, there is no action, no results, and no success.

Is that you? Or someone you know?

• If so, a third reason "knowing what to want" is difficult is because you might have a "fixed" mindset.


YOUR MINDSET AND SUCCESS (OR LACK OF IT)
In MINDSET: The New Psychology of Success, Carol Dweck identifies 2 different mindsets (belief structures) that determine whether we succeed at what matters to us, or not.

People working with a FIXED mindset believe their intelligence, talents, and ability to create results that matter are fixed. You have them, or you do not. Nothing can be done to change fixed traits.

Because they believe traits and abilities are fixed, fixed mindset people focus on demonstrating what they do well. But they are reluctant to learn new things.

They hide weaknesses. They are afraid to fail or look foolish, so they avoid practice, and fail to grow their talents and abilities or achieve success.


THE GROWTH MINDSET AND SUCCESS
People with a GROWTH mindset believe intelligence, talent, and ability to create can be developed through passion, practice, and persistence.

They do NOT have to prove they are smart or able. They are not afraid of looking foolish if it will lead to learning. They risk failing because they know growth and change are possible, and that failure is useful feedback.

Growth mindset people don't focus on grooming an image. Their focus is learning to create what they most want.

Growth mindset people are passionate about results they want to produce, AND passionate about learning how to create them. They know passion-driven practice and persistence lead to improved abilities, increased talent, and successful results.

Here is the good news. You can learn to work from a growth mindset.

If you embrace a growth mindset, you will likely create success far beyond what you have created so far.

You will be able to tap into the awesome power of passion, through practice, and persistence. You will be able to harness your time and effort in the service of your deepest desires and highest aspirations.

Confident that you can learn what it takes to make your dreams a reality, you will be much more likely to put in the persistent practice to successfully do so.

From over 20 years of coaching, I know that those who consistently practice the skills and structure of creating succeed at creating what matters. Those who don't practice don't succeed.

I doubt the success you long for will take 10,000 hours. But if it does, it will be worth it.
--------

Feel free to send this article to others, but please keep the bio attached.
---------------------
Bruce Elkin is the author of Simplicity and Success and 2 e-books. He is also an internationally known Personal and Professional Renewal Coach. Get his eNewsletter at http://www.bruceelkin.com/free.html For more info, visit http://www.BruceElkin.com and http://createwhatmattersmost.blogspot.com
---------------------------------------------------------------------------




> ARE YOU DOING WHAT YOU LOVE WITH YOUR LIFE?
Would you like to create what truly matters to you in life/work?
=========================================
I work with capable people who are stuck, stalled, or struggling with complicated life/work challenges.

I help them develop the SKILLS, STRUCTURE, and SUPPORT to make the complex simple, and get going on what matters. I also encourage and support practice as they turn visions into reality!

I can help you find what you love-and create a life that shows it!

> NOW is is a great time to re-assess purpose, direction, and action. It is a great time to enter into a coaching relationship. it can help you make this year, your best year ever!

My schedule for January and February is filling fast, so act now.

>If you would like my fr.ee 7-page info package, e-mail me with "Coaching Info" as the subject at Bruce@BruceElkin.com
---------------



QUOTABLE QUOTES:
=============
"When Babe Didrickson Zaharias, often called the 'athletic phenomenon of all time,' won the British woman's gold tournament, people said: Oh, she's an automatic champion, a natural athlete. When Babe started golfing in earnest thirteen years ago she hit as many as 1,000 balls in one afternoon, playing until her hands were so sore they had to be taped."
-- James Keller

"Do not think of today's failures, but of the success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourself a difficult task, but you will succeed if you persevere; and you will find a joy in overcoming obstacles."
-- Helen Keller

"Some men give up their designs when they have almost reached the goal; while others, on the contrary, obtain a victory by exerting, at the last moment, more vigorous efforts than ever before."
-- Herodotus

"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan, 'press on' has solved, and always will solve, the problems of the human race.
-- Calvin Coolidge
--------------------



If you want help learning to practice, master, and create what MOST matters to you, let me know. I'm happy to send you my coaching info package. Just email me with "Coaching Info: as subject at Bruce@BruceElkin.com
Cheers!
Bruce
**************************************************
> BRUCE ELKIN:
Personal, Professional, and Organization Renewal Coach
>Call: 250.388.7210 www.BruceElkin.com Or Skype Me!
**************************************************
> View the current issue of my full newsletter at
http://createwhatmattersmost.blogspot.com/
-------------------

> USEFUL RESOURCES AND PLANNING TOOLS:
=============================
Thinking about creating or upgrading your website and marketing approach? I use these tools with great results and recommend them without reservation. And Robert has recently made some great updates to the Website Toolkit. Great stuff!

* For info or to purchase a copy of THE WEBSITE TOOLKIT,
please go to http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?af=73714

* THE ACTION PLAN TOOL KIT can make designing and
Implementing a marketing plan easier, effective, and fun.
Go to http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?af=73714