Change Your Structure; Change Your Life!

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"SIMPLY SUCCESS" -January 30, 2008
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>Helping You Create What Matters MOST in Life and Work
Bruce Elkin: Life/Work Renewal Coach
Personal - Professional - Organizational
http://www.BruceElkin.com
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Hi ,
Nothing special about the weather here this week. Typical mix of wind and rain, but warmer than last. More early flowers appearing. Time to get the bike tuned and oiled.

A lot of people get themselves tuned and oiled this time of year (metaphorically speaking). They resolve to get fit, get healthy, get richer, get friendlier, and, maybe, bring about world peace.

They may read a self-help book or attend a workshop or see a coach or counselor. They're excited, ready to act, looking forward to results. But something happens.

The results don't come easily. Things take longer than they thought. They are harder than they thought they'd be. And things go wrong. People backslide, feel bad, judge themselves negatively, and feel down, and depressed.

Often, they give up the project as a lost cause and slip back into their old ways, feeling that their worst fears about their own inability to create what matters have been confirmed.

Sound familiar?

Here's the good news. It's probably not you or your actions that don't work; it's more likely the STRUCTURE in which you take those actions that doesn't work.

All action takes place within a structure -- an organizing framework -- that guides your actions and influences your results. For most, that structure is unconscious, unseen. They are not aware of it.

So they can't change it, and, to truly change your behavior in a real and lasting way, you have to change the structure that gives rise to it.

Think of a rocking chair. It's a great structure for going back and forth in. You put energy into it by leaning back, and the chair returns that energy as it rocks forward. Very relaxing. Ahhhh!

But if you want to go to the store, a rocking chair is not a very good structure in which to do so. A bike is a better structure. While a rocking chair is designed to oscillate back and forth, a bike is designed to go somewhere and stay there.

In your life, you may find that you're trying to go somewhere in a rocking chair structure,. No matter how hard you try, no matter how good your ideas and actions are, at some point you find all your energy going in the opposite direction to what you want.

There are many examples where this occurs: dieting, getting fit, developing new habits at work, fixing a shaky relationship, etc…

Again, it's not usually you, it's the structure. Change the structure and you'll change your results. Get out of the rocking chair, and get on your bike or in your ca,r and your trip to the store will likely be much more successful.

One of the major structural reasons that prevens peole from producing real and lasting change is that they operate in the structure of PROBLEM-SOLVING.

But most changes we want to make are not really problems that need to be solved; they are challenges that arise out of some deep-seated desire. To be healthy, to be fit, to be loved, to love, to succeed at what matters. All of these desire-driven challenges are best organized with the structure of CREATING.

Creating is a superior structure to problem-solving because it can include and transcend problem solving within it. When you know how to CREATE, you can see problems as merely part of your current reality, but not the driving force behind your actions.

Your vision of desired results drives the action. You account for the problems and take action that acknowledges them, but that action stays focused on moving toward the result you care about and want to create.

To give you a sense of how this plays out, I'd like to share a recent not from a long-term client to whom I have on-going coaching role.

She is selling her home so she can buy a property on which to develop an organic food products business. It's a slow process, and she's being careful. But her actions are (usually) driven by vision, grounded in reality, and focused on resulst that matter.

Generally, she's making good progress. Soon, I imagine the pieces will come together and she will experience the joy of being on the steep part of the learning curve, where results come fast and furiously.

Here's what she had to say about overcoming a recent setback. She "felt overwhelmed" by too much to do at work and in getting her home ready to show, and had view these things as problems she "had to" solve. This approach was stressing her out.

I'd suggested she reduce her stress by taking "recovery breaks" (where she gets up. moves around, and does something different) every 90 minutes, AND make sure she views challenges from a CREATING orientation and framework.

Here's her reply:

"Hi Bruce,

"Just a quick note to follow-up from our consult this morning....

"What a valuable session - my rest of the day at the College was significantly more pleasant and productive as I consciously shifted from problem-solving mode to creating mode.... I also bought a journal diary at the College bookstore this afternoon where I will briefly denote my 'calm and confident' result breaks during the day at the College for this term...today I chose to have two such breaks.....

"When I came home for lunch today, I took 15 minutes to begin a designated area of my bedroom to increase its show-ability...it went so well that I extended the 15 minutes to 30 minutes and achieved the result I set for myself today re: the bedroom showability - I got more 'done' in this productive 30 minutes than I had in my 'stewin' mode' the last 2 weeks....

"With your help, I continue to experience the profound difference between the creation mode of life and the problem solving mode of life - and I ALWAYS like my life a whole lot more when I'm creatin'

"You do good work coach - thanks! Brenda"


CREATING is not just for artists or musicians or writers; it's for all of us.
It is a time-tested and vastly more successful way of producing real and lasting results that matter than is problem-solving. And it feels soooo much better.

For more on the skills and structure of creating, see my book SIMPLICITY AND SUCCESS: Creating the Life You Long For, or go to my website BruceElkin.com, mouse over "About Me" and click on Writer. Lots of free articles and ebooks there.
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>QUOTABLE QUOTES:
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"All the greatest and most important problems of life are fundamentally insoluble... They can never be solved, but only outgrown. This "outgrowth" proved on further investigation to require a new level of consciousness. Some higher or wider interest appeared on the patient's horizon, and through this broadening of his or her outlook the insoluble problem lost its urgency. It was not solved logically in its own terms but faded when confronted with a new and stronger life urge."
- C.J. Jung

"Real change isn't motivated by either crisis or fear. The best inspiration comes from leaders who can create compelling and positive visions of the future."
-- Alan Deutschman

"True happiness comes from the joy of deeds well done, the zest of creating things new."
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

"We create our lives a thought at a time. And sometimes, it comes down to changing a thought such as "Why did this happen to me?" into "there is a reason for this, and my choice is to create the most positive reaction I can."
-- Dee Wallace Stone

"A man of good will with a little effort and belief in his own powers can enjoy a deep, tranquil, rich life -- provided he go his own way. He need not and should not think of making a good living, but rather of creating a good life for himself. To live one's own life is still the best way of life, always was, and always will be."
-- Henry Miller
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>If you want help shifting from a problem solving focus to a focus on creating what truly matters to you, let me know. I'm happy to send you my coaching info package. Just email me with "Coaching Info: as subject at Bruce@BruceElkin.com
Cheers!
Bruce
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> BRUCE ELKIN:
Personal, Professional, and Organization Renewal Coach
>Call: 250.388.7210 www.BruceElkin.com Or Skype Me!
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