TURN RESOLUTIONS INTO REALITY!
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"SIMPLY SUCCESS" -- Dec 20, 2007
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>Helping You Create What Matters MOST in Life and Work
Bruce Elkin: Life/Work Renewal Coach
Personal - Professional - Organizational
http://www.BruceElkin.com
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Hi ,
Only 10 more days left in 2007. How has it been? How would you like next year to be? Have you given any thought to your New Year's resolutions?
Not likely. Most folks don't do so until, well, New Year's.
But this week, I suggest you use the suggestions in the following piece to reflect on how you want to make 2008 your best year ever.
Then, instead of just writing down -- or worse, thinking about -- goals that may or may not work for you, use the process I suggest to envision the results you truly want, ground them in reality, and take actions that consistently support your results -- in spite of the reality you face.
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TURN RESOLUTIONS INTO REALITY!
7 Practices for Creating What Matters Most In 2008
“Quitting smoking is easy!” quipped a friend. “I’ve done it hundreds of times.” Resolutions were, to him, just a fun New Year’s ritual. He didn’t expect results. But I do.
And so do my coaching clients. Each January they resolve to quit smoking, lose weight, get in shape, be nice, improve business, make more (or less) money, and so on. And many succeed.
But, each year, many complain that something upsets their plans. They ignore their resolve and drift back to comfortable but ineffective habits. Instead of reaping the results and rewards they want, they create frustration, guilt, and depression.
Sound familiar? If so, don’t beat yourself up; that compounds guilt and depression.
Making New Year's resolutions that work-- and keep working-- throughout the year is more than just writing down a list of goals on January 1st.
Instead, try these 7 practices to turn your resolutions into reality. They can help you create—and sustain—almost any result that matters to you.
SEVEN PRACTICES FOR CREATING ALMOST ANYTHING
1. Create A Clear, Compelling Vision
First, focus on what you want to create--not what you want to get rid of.
Change "lose weight" to "A lean, healthy, and well-toned body I feel great about.”
“Quit smoking” becomes “The clean, fit and healthy lungs of a non-smoker.”
This simple change does two things: 1) It shifts you from a focus on a problem you do NOT want to a result you DO want. And it shifts your focus from a process to an end result.
It’s fine to start with concepts such as “a great relationship,” or “a better business.” But, power comes from focusing fuzzy concepts into clear, compelling visions. Picture the success criteria of what you want to create. What will it look and feel like when you succeed?
A clear, compelling vision focuses energy and generates power.
Which is more compelling? The concept, "A new car.” Or, a vision of “A candy-apple red, 2008 Smart Car convertible with black top, beige leather interior, and awesome stereo.”
Envision your result as if you had already created it. “I am fit, healthy, and energetic. I weigh “x” pounds, wear size “x” slacks. I look great, feel terrific and people compliment me.
Later, you’ll set realistic sub-goals to bridge the gap between vision and reality.
2. Assess Reality Accurately and Objectively
Vision not rooted in reality is merely daydreaming.
As well as your destination, you need to know your starting point. If you want to go to New York and think you’re in Chicago, but are actually in Denver, you will go the wrong way. So, carefully assess where you are now, in relationship to your desired result.
Unfortunately, many of us distort reality. Instead of describing it, we judge it.
We say, “Everything is screwed up,” when only a small part does not work. Or, “Everything is great,” when it isn’t. When we distort reality, we create a shaky foundation for action.
The key to assessing reality accurately is describe it, don’t judge it! Instead of, “Everything is failing,” say, “There's a couple of glitches, but 90 percent of the project works well.”
Describing reality establishes a solid platform for action. Also, by making current reality emotionally neutral, your vision becomes a stronger force.
3. Hold Vision and Reality Together In Creative Tension
Creative tension is the engine of creating. It generates energy for action. Moreover, it lets us explore and experiment without getting lost.
To set up creative tension, hold in mind a clear picture of where you want to go together with an objective description of current reality. Imagine a rubber band stretched between Vision and Current Reality. The tension in the band wants to resolve.
There are only three ways it can:
• Let go of your vision, and give up your goals.
• Lower your vision, and compromise your goals.
• Hold vision firmly and change reality so it—and you—move toward your result.
Holding vision and reality in tension sets up an organizing framework in which you can experiment, explore, learn from experience, and shape results you want. Success comes from using creative tension to make choices that support your desired results.
4. Take small steps. Create and adjust.
Many of us are closet perfectionists. Because we demand that our first steps be perfect, if we falter, we are likely to give up.
Worse, fear of failing prevents us from even getting started.
Instead, I help my clients work backward until they identify small, easy steps. I encourage them to see those actions as experiments that teach them what to do next. If you make a wrong decision, make another. In this creative process, failure is merely feedback.
You can work back from vision to “first steps” by asking, "Can I do this today?" If you can’t, ask, "What must I do first?”
If, for example, your vision is to be fit and energetic enough to run a half-marathon, but you get winded walking up stairs, you obviously can’t do it today. So what must you do first?
Build an aerobic base. Can you do that today? No. What must you do first?
Start walking a mile a day. And so on.
Working back to first steps overcomes inertia and fear. Completing several steps creates a pattern of success. Patterns of success increase confidence, help you stretch toward larger steps, and build momentum.
5. Momentum
Momentum will get you through times when motivation fails. Any time you encounter adversity is a chance to build momentum.
To do so:
1. Notice what you say to yourself about the situation, yourself, and others.
2. Is it consistent with what you want? Is it true? Is it accurate and objective? If not, make it so.
3. Then ask, "What do I want?" Envision a clear picture of your desired result.
4. Choose what you want. Say, “I choose…” and add your result.
5. Take whatever next step occurs to you.
Use this technique when you are angry, frustrated, depressed, or faced with adversity. It’ll shift your focus from problem solving to creating, and flip your mood from negative to energetic.
6. Practice, Practice, Practice!
We are learners. We try things, correct mistakes, and practice until the new becomes natural.
Practice may not make us perfect, but it will make us better—and the road to success always runs through better.
For example, a client wanted to be a “good guitar player.” But, because she judged she “wasn’t good,” she didn’t practice. When a friend showed her how to play a simple, three-chord country song, she was confused. She wasn’t good, but she could play a song.
I helped her change her judgment to the more accurate description that she “wasn’t good, yet.” She started practicing, and, in no time, she was playing well.
Making success an all or nothing leap often leaves you with nothing.
7. Know When You Reach Your Goal
It is not enough to say, "I want to be successful." Without guidelines for success, you are like a dog chasing its tail.
Consistently assess your reality against the success criteria in your vision to see if it matches. If it does, you’re done.
Completing a creation generates new energy with which to initiate new creations. Asked what his favorite painting was, Picasso quickly answered, “My next one!”
Finish fully, acknowledge your results, and celebrate your success. Start on your next result. Success builds on success.
Remember, as Goethe advised, “What ever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
Last New Year’s, my friend tried out this approach, and he hasn’t smoked since.
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Bruce Elkin is the author of Simplicity and Success and 2 e-books. He is also an internationally known Personal and Professional Renewal Coach. Get his eNewsletter at http://www.bruceelkin.com/free.html For more info, visit http://www.BruceElkin.com and http://createwhatmattersmost.blogspot.com
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> ARE YOU DOING WHAT YOU LOVE WITH YOUR LIFE?
Would you like to create what truly matters to you in life/work?
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I work with capable people who are stuck, stalled, or struggling with complicated life/work challenges.
I help them develop the SKILLS, STRUCTURE, and SUPPORT to make the complex simple, get going again on what matters, and turn visions into reality!
I can help you find what you love-and create a life that shows it!
> The New Year is is a great time to re-assess purpose, direction, and action. January is a great time to enter into a coaching relationship. it can help you make the coming year, your best year ever!
So, if you are interested, it might help to make your move now. That way you can jump-start your new year early in January. My schedule for January and February is filling fast.
>If you would like my fr.ee 7-page info package, e-mail me with "Coaching Package" as the subject at Bruce@BruceElkin.com
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Quotable Quotes:
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"In the midst of our holiday “madness,” we often forget that what most people want, more than anything else, is to be truly appreciated by us. The best gift we can give to the people in our lives is the gift of our true appreciation and love."
-- Mike Robbins
"But now," says the Once-ler,
"now that you're here,
the word of the Lorax seems perfectly clear.
UNLESS someone like you
cares a whole awful lot,
nothing is going to get better.
It's not."
Dr. Seuss
"You have to create tension between reality and aspiration"
- Sumantra Ghoshal
"You win by trying. And failing. Test, try, fail, measure, evolve, repeat, persist"
-- Seth Godin
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You will not receive this newsletter for a few weeks, as I'm taking a short hiatus to practice what I preach about rest, relaxation, and recovering. But I'll be back and raring to go the week of Jan 7.
I wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.
May 2008 truly be your best year yet!
If you want help learning to empower yourself and create what truly matters to you, let me know. I'm happy to send you my coaching info package.
Cheers!
Bruce
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> BRUCE ELKIN:
Personal, Professional, and Organization Renewal Coach
>Call: 250.388.7210 www.BruceElkin.com Or Skype Me!
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> View the current issue of my full newsletter at
http://createwhatmattersmost.blogspot.com/
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Labels: change, goals, New Years, resolutions, success, transistion
posted by BruceElkin.com @ 9:20 AM
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