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>SIMPLICITY and SUCCESS:
Creating What Matters MOST in Life & Work
Vol. 5, #2, December 20, 2006 All rights reserved.
Bruce Elkin: Personal/Professional Life/Success Coach for 20 Years
http://www.BruceElkin.com
Sent to confirmed subscribers only. List is never shared or sold!
>View current & back issues of my full newsletter on my blog at
http://createwhatmattersmost.blogspot.com/
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"Those who contemplate the beauty of the Earth
find reserves of strength that will endure as long as life lasts.
"There is something infinitely healing in the repeated refrains of nature
— the assurance that dawn comes after night, and spring after winter."
-- Rachel Carson
Hi All,
Well, the Christmas/Holiday times are almost upon us. Lights are up. The jazz station is playing carols. And the little kids at the Waldorf School next door already have visions of sugarplums dancing in their minds.
I would like to wish you all a very merry, joyous, and love-filled Yuletide.
Thanks for your support this year. And I hope you have a wonderfully simple, successful, and sustainable 2007.
To help with that, I've revised and updated an article that I hope will help you turn this year's resolutions into reality -- and sustain them.
All the best of the season to you.
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>1.FEATURE ARTICLE:
TURN YOUR RESOLUTIONS INTO REALITY
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7 Practices for Creating What Matters Most In 2007
“Quitting smoking is easy!” quipped a friend. “I’ve done it hundreds of times.”
Resolutions were, to him, just a fun New Year’s ritual. He didn’t expect results.
I do. So do my coaching clients. Each January they resolve to quit smoking, lose weight, get in shape, be nice, improve business, make more (or less) money, and so on. And many succeed.
But, each year, many complain that something upsets their plans. They ignore their resolve and drift back to comfortable but ineffective habits. Instead of reaping the results and rewards they want, they create frustration, guilt, and depression.
Sound familiar?
If so, don’t beat yourself up; that compounds guilt and depression.
Instead, try these 7 practices to turn your resolutions into reality. They can help you create—and sustain—almost result that matters to you.
7 PRACTICES FOR CREATING ALMOST ANYTHING
1. Create A Clear, Compelling Vision
Focus on what you want to create, not what you want to get rid of.
"Lose weight" becomes "A lean, well-toned body.”
“Quit smoking” becomes “The clean, fit and healthy lungs of a non-smoker.”
It’s fine to start with concepts such as “a great relationship,” or “a better business.” But, power comes from focusing fuzzy concepts into clear, compelling visions. Picture the success criteria of what you want to create. What will it look like when you succeed?
A clear, compelling vision focuses energy and generates power. Which is more compelling?
The concept, "A new car.” Or, a vision of “A candy-apple red, 2007 Mini Cooper convertible with black top, beige leather interior, and six-speaker stereo.”
Envision your result as if you had already created it. “I am fit, healthy, and energetic. I weigh “x” pounds, wear size “x” slacks. I feel terrific and people compliment me.
Later, once reality is clear, you’ll set realistic sub-goals to bridge the gap between vision and reality.
2. Assess Reality Accurately and Objectively
Vision not rooted in reality is daydreaming.
As well as your destination, you need to know your starting point. If you want to go to New York and think you’re in Chicago, but are actually in Denver, you will go the wrong way. So, once vision is clear, carefully assess where you are now, in relationship to you desired result.
Unfortunately, many of us misrepresent reality. Instead of describing it, we judge it. We say, “Everything is screwed up,” when only a small part does not work. Or, “Everything is great,” when it isn’t. When we distort reality, we create a shaky foundation for action.
The key to assessing reality is to describe it, don’t judge it! Instead of saying, “Everything is screwed up,” say, “There's a couple of glitches, but 90 percent of the project works well.”
Describing reality establishes a solid platform for action. Also, by making current reality emotionally neutral, vision becomes our driving force.
3. Hold Vision and Reality Together In Creative Tension
Creative tension is the engine of creating. It generates energy for action. Moreover, it lets us explore and experiment without getting lost.
To set up creative tension, hold in mind a clear picture of where you want to go together with an objective description of current reality.
Imagine a rubber band stretched between Vision and Current Reality. The tension in the band wants to resolve. There are only three way sit can:
• Let go of your vision and give up your goals.
• Lower your vision and compromise your goals.
• Hold vision firmly and change reality so it—and you—move toward your result.
Holding vision and reality in tension sets up an organizing framework in which to experiment, explore, learn from experience, and shape the results you want.
Success comes from resolving creative tension by making choices that support your desired results.
4. Take small steps. Create and adjust.
Many of us are closet perfectionists. Because we demand that our first steps be perfect, when we falter we give up.
Worse, fear of failing prevents us from getting started.
Instead, take small, easy steps. See them as experiments that teach you what to do next. If you make a wrong decision, make another one. Failure is merely feedback.
If you’re not sure where to start, work backward from vision to “first steps” by asking, "Can I do this today?" If you can’t, ask, "What must I do first?”
If, for example, your vision is to be fit and energetic enough to run a half-marathon, but you get winded walking up stairs, you obviously can’t do it today. So what must you do first?
Build an aerobic base. Can you do that today? No. What must you do first?
Working back to first steps overcomes inertia and fear.
Completing several steps creates a pattern of success. Patterns of success increase confidence, help you stretch toward larger steps, and build momentum.
5. Momentum
Momentum will get you through times when motivation fails. Any time you encounter adversity is a chance to build momentum.
To do so:
1. Notice what you say to yourself about the situation, yourself, and others.
2. Is it consistent with what you want? Is it true? Is it accurate and objective? If not, make it so.
3. Then ask, "What do I want?" Envision a clear picture of your desired result.
5. Take whatever next step occurs to you.
Use this technique when you are angry, frustrated, depressed, or faced with adversity. It’ll shift your focus from problem solving to creating, and flip your mood from negative to energetic.
6. Practice, Practice, Practice!
We are learners. We try things, correct mistakes, and practice until the new becomes natural.
Practice may not make us perfect, but it will make us better—and the road to success always runs through better.
For example, a client wanted to be a “good guitar player.” But, because she judged she “wasn’t good,” she didn’t practice. When a friend showed her a simple, three-chord country song, she was confused. She wasn’t good, but she could play a song.
I helped her change her judgment to the more accurate description that she “wasn’t good, yet.” She started practicing, and, in no time, she was playing well.
Making success an all or nothing leap often leaves you with nothing.
7. Know When You Reach Your Goal
It is not enough to say, "I want to be successful." Without guidelines for success, you are like a dog chasing its tail.
Consistently assess your reality against the success criteria in your vision to see if it matches. If it does, you’re done.
Completing a creation generates new energy with which to initiate new creations. Asked what his favorite painting was, Picasso quickly answered, “My next one!”
Finish fully, acknowledge your results, and celebrate your success. Start on your next result. Success builds on success.
Remember, as Goethe advised, “What ever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
Last New Year’s, my friend Ken tried out this approach and hasn’t smoked since.
Bruce Elkin, author of Simplicity and Success and 2 e-books, is also an internationally known Personal, Professional, and Organizational Renewal Coach. Get his eNewsletter at http://www.bruceelkin.com/free.html For more info, visit www.BruceElkin.com and http://createwhatmattersmost.blogspot.com
2. A LITTLE GIFT FOR YOU
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Jennifer White, Exec Director of The Simplicity Forum, and her partner were recently on Hallmark TV. Jen spoke of the simple yet very successful lives they'd created together in a way I think gets at the essential reason for living simply, successfully, and sustainably. Jen and her partner are also excellent folks musicians and their music is featured on the video clip.
>To access this clip--and I hope you do--go to their website (www.sferesandwhite.com) and click on the link next to the photo of Jen and Jeremy singing. When you get to the Hallmark site, scroll down to "Nurturing the Spirit" and click on the word "Video" next to that.
Enjoy!
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3. "COACHING for CREATING WHAT MATTERS MOST!"
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> WANT TO MAKE THIS YOUR BEST YEAR EVER?
But…
- Feeling stuck? Stalled? Drifting?
- In transition? Not sure what to do next?
- Facing complicated challenges with no real organizing framework?
>Would you like to be:
* Clear about what most deeply matters to you?
* Able to create results that support what matters?
* Able to do more with less stress and striving?
* Feel on track and moving toward desired results --
in spite of problems, circumstances, and adversity?
* Feel free, energized, and full of zest for life, work, or whatever…?
> If so, my CREATING WHAT MATTERS MOST coaching program can help you develop the SKILLS, STRUCTURE, AND SUPPORT to turn this year's New Year's resolutions into reality.
> Check out my fr.ee 45-minute coaching consultation:
"My friend got your info and had a mini-coaching session with
you. She said it was amazing. Can I do a session?"
- A. M., Victoria, BC
> I have spaces for new clients in January. FOR INFO, e-mail me at Bruce@BruceElkin.com with "Coaching Package" as the subject.
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> 4. RESOURCES I RECOMMEND:
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> * THE SOUNDER SLEEP SYSTEM:
Can’t sleep? Need help relaxing and drifting off?
Get THE INSOMNIA SOLUTION by Michael Krugman. It’s a great book
on how to get the deep, restful sleep you crave. I use MP3 files in which Michael teaches soothing, restful guided exercises. For info, got to http://www.soundersleep.com/start.php?mpuid=1215
* MARKETING AND WEBSITE TOOLS:
Thinking about upgrading your website and marketing
approach? I've used these products with great results and
recommend them without reservation.
* For info or to purchase a copy of THE WEBSITE TOOLKIT,
please go to http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?af=73714
* THE ACTION PLAN TOOL KIT can make designing and
implementing a marketing plan easier, effective, and fun.
Go to http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?af=73714
* A GREAT NEWSLETTER BY AN EX-CLIENT OF MINE:
If you are interested in Health, Environment, and Negotiation,
please check out the eNewsletter HEN. Written by Julia
Menard, a Victoria-based coach, and mediation expert, HEN is
an excellent source of info. E-mail
with "sub.scribe HEN Musings" in the subject line.
* FR.EE VALUES and HAPPINESS ASSESSMENT:
Martin Seligman, author of Authentic Happiness, offers an
excellent way to support you in creating happiness in daily life.
Go to www.authentichappiness.org and do his Values-in-Action
Signature Strengths Survey. it will help you increase your authentic
happiness. I do it. It works.
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> 6. THE LAST WORD: QUOTABLE QUOTES
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"People become really quite remarkable when they start thinking that they can do things. When they believe in themselves they have the first secret of success."
-- Norman Vincent Peale
"Everything's in the mind. That's where it all starts. Knowing what you want is the first step toward getting it."
-- Mae West
"Success is neither magical or mysterious. Success is the natural consequence of consistently applying the basic fundamentals."
-- Jim Rohn
"It is good to dream, but it is better to dream and work. Faith is mighty, but action with faith is mightier. Desiring is helpful, but work and desire are invincible."
-- Thomas Robert Gaines
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> THANKS FOR YOUR SUPPORT!
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THANKS for forwarding my newsletter and short posts. I appreciate your support. New subscribers are vital in keeping the newsletter alive and thriving. So please keep forwarding them to friends and associates.
If you received this from a friend, please sign up for your own sub at http://www.bruceelkin.com/newsletter.html
You’ll also get some neat fr.ee gift.s!
All the best! Peace on Earth!
Bruce
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>BRUCE ELKIN: Personal/Professional Results & Renewal Coach
Author:- Simplicity & Success: Creating the Life You Long For
- Emotional Mastery: Manage Your Moods & Create What
Matters--With Whatever Life Gives You
> http://www.BruceElkin.com 250-388.7210 Skype Me!
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All material herein is copyright © Bruce Elkin, 2006.
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